Gentlemen, start your sinning! NASCAR rolls into Las Vegas this weekend for the Shelby 427, which raises the question: Was the race shortened from the Shelby 500 to make more time for gambling? No matter, the green flag doesn’t drop until Sunday, which leaves plenty of time for NASCAR’s drivers to be tourists.
RedEye humbly suggests some Sin City activities for the sport’s finest.
— Michael Hines, RedEye
LET IT RIDE
Skip the $15 blackjack tables, fellas. It’s not a trip to Vegas unless you risk at least 10 grand on your car’s number.
TAKE IN A SHOW
We’re thinking Carrot Top at Luxor is a good fit.
GRAND CANYON DAY TRIP
Rent a sports car. With professional driving skills, you’ll be there and back in a half-hour, tops — an hour if you make a pit stop at one of those famous legal brothels.
GET HITCHED
In the grand tradition of Britney Spears and childhood friend Jason Alexander — or Ross and Rachel in “Friends” — throw caution to the wind and get yourself a surprise spouse!
HIT THE BUFFET
Get there before Tony Stewart shows up if you want any macaroni salad.
WATCH A FIGHT
Floyd Mayweather Jr. won’t be lacing up the gloves at Caesars Palace over the weekend, but there’s gotta be a celebrity boxing freak show somewhere on the strip. Danny Bonaduce vs. Octo Mom? Ask your hotel concierge.
Five on one
Our panelists are like the judges of the sports world — you can always find them on the bench! Sign up for weekday Five on Five at redeyechicago.com/facebookfives.
The topic: If Chicago athletes had a YouTube channel like Mayor Daley’s, what videos would you like to see?
Supriya Doshi: A montage of Chicago coaches blowing up last year. It would be hours long.
Jim Walsh: I’m always in the market for online rants. Maybe Ozzie’s available.
Tracy Swartz: Athletes hitting balls. Those are always the best shots on “America’s Funniest Home Videos.”
Jimmy Greenfield: Mayor Daley hit in groin by football.
Brian Moore: There must be video proof somewhere — anywhere — that Rex Grossman can play football.
Watch Dog
WHIZZER
Here’s what I’m watching this weekend.
NBA
Bulls vs. Houston
7 p.m. Saturday, WGN
All right, new guys, show us what you got.
NHL
Blackhawks vs. L.A.
2 p.m. Sunday, WGN
Only one can be crowned the winner — yeah, that was cheesy.
