Best of times …
If these playoff wins keep coming, Stick Figure’s going to look like a skinny Joaquin Phoenix with all that facial hair.
Leo Ebersole
Phillip Thompson
Marc Silverman
Elliott Serrano
Stick Figure
Exactly how good do Chicago sports fans have it right now?
They haven’t been able to breathe this easy since Silverman swore off bean dip.
You can’t get carried away right now. Wait until the victory parades.
It’s called a multiple sportsgasm and it’s great.
Bulls and Hawks in the playoffs; hope springs eternal for the Cubs and Sox: It’s the ’90s again!
So good Leo’s been giggling like a schoolgirl all day.
More impressive young playoff hero: Derrick Rose or Jonathan Toews?
Not to go all Nike ad on it, but Derrick Rose didn’t just win, he started building his legacy.
Tyrus Thomas, for going this long without doing something “Artesty.”
Not playing your “little game.” A few years ago I was forced to root for Eddy Curry and Tyler Arnason.
Derrick Rose, who overcame the ghost of Red Auerbach and phantom foul calls.
I can’t pick. That’s like choosing between strawberry ice cream and cotton candy.
How are these Bulls and Blackhawks wins changing the way you think of them?
I am now much less likely to offer a Blackhawks fan entry into the Witness Protection Program.
Now that their fans don’t need them, I have to find some place to recycle my paper bags.
I don’t want Vinny fired anymore. I just want him to be an assistant while his dad coaches the Bulls.
I just started thinking about them again, so don’t get greedy.
I always knew they were winners. Yay Bulls and Blackhawks!
Got any advice for Stick Figure as he grows his hockey playoff beard?
Go easy on the beard wax — you don’t want to eat it for more than two meals a day.
You can use Wite-Out as shaving cream.
For beard-growing tips, call Kyle Orton. For manscaping tips, call Phil.
If Woolly Willy can do it, so can you!
There’s another guy here named Stick Figure? Whoa, that is weird.
Why did a jury acquit IndyCar driver Helio Castroneves of tax evasion?
You just don’t cross someone who’s been on “Dancing With the Stars.”
I guess they figure someone named Helio could make a balloon payment.
If the driving gloves don’t fit, you must acquit.
Can’t convict what you can’t catch! You think they’d remember to take away his car keys.
He’s just a really nice guy. Nice guys don’t do stuff like that.
