Remember that old line attributed to Groucho Marx? The one about how he would never want to belong to any club that would accept him as a member?
I understand completely, although with me it`s not social clubs that bring this to mind. It`s restaurants-specifically, restaurants with dress codes.
I don`t dress so great. Personality flaw. One of several. And when I show up at a restaurant that has a dress code, and find that I am in violation of that dress code, I never put up a fuss about leaving. I simply say ”You`re right” and take off. I respect a place for having standards. You don`t want me there, I`m gone. Here`s to you.
Over the years I have run into all kinds of dress codes, virtually all of which I have occasionally been in violation of. No jeans; jacket required; tie required; all that stuff.
Here in Atlanta, though, I ran into the most bizarre dress code I have ever encountered. I wasn`t even in violation of it, but I loved it. I`m not going to name the restaurant-I`ll explain why further down in the column-but I will quote its dress code.
The dress code ”respectfully requests” that ”proper attire” be worn.
Now here`s the great part:
”Management regrets that denim, shorts, athletic clothing and name tags are not considered proper attire….”
Did you get that? No name tags. Come into the restaurant wearing a raggedy pair of cut-off jeans and you`re out. Come into the restaurant wearing an $800 suit and a convention name tag. . .and you`re out.
Fantastic.
Name tags are just about the most dehumanizing items that corporate America has ever dreamed up. At many company meetings and conventions, name tags are not only supplied-they`re required. You`ve got to wear them every waking moment.
Name tags range all the way from the ”Hi! My Name Is. . .” sort to the somber versions that announce their wearers` status in the company`s pecking order. Granted, they serve several functions-they act as a quick introduction, they tell what a person does for a living and where the person lives, they save the embarrassment that comes when one person is frantically trying to remember the name of a client or colleague.
For all those reasons, we`re probably doomed to live with name tags forever. Still, I doubt that many people, given the choice, would wear them. Deep down, they`re a reminder that we`re all nobodies, and a taunting hint that without name tags, we would have no identities.
And now here`s this elegant restaurant in Atlanta that classifies people who have name tags pinned to their clothes right along with people who don`t wear shoes.
I spoke with the man in charge.
”When we set any kind of standard it is at the behest of our guests,”
he said. ”A certain level and standard is expected to be espoused.”
The man said that the restaurant ”expects guests to be attired as ladies and gentlemen.” Just as a man without a jacket or a woman in shorts would be out of place at the restaurant, a man or woman with a name tag would be out of place.
The man said that, on occasion, he has worn a name tag. ”Certainly,” he said. ”In the proper place, they are fine.”
That place, though, is not his restaurant. If someone shows up with a name tag pinned to his suit jacket or her dress, ”We refer to the standards respectfully. Most people are willing to comply.”
Now. . .why not name this restaurant?
According to the man who runs the place, ”We had a situation our first year with a famous guest who did not agree with our dress code.” The guest held a press conference and ”made his feelings very clear.”
Atlanta is a big convention town. I can envision this column running, and pressure being put upon the restaurant to revise its name tag policy. No city likes conventioneers to feel they are unwanted.
So we`ll leave the place anonymous for now. Wouldn`t want to be responsible for a lawsuit from someone claiming that the restaurant is violating his or her constitutional rights by banning name tags.
You`ll know the restaurant if you try to walk in with a name tag pinned to your clothes. And if you should see me:
Hi! My name is Bob!
