Jane Hoven has triple vision: triple strollers, triple cribs and three times the number of diapers, bottles and formula most mothers need to buy.
“Even when I shop for children’s clothes, I just automatically take the price of an item and triple the cost,” Hoven said. “I’ve never had a single child, so I don’t have any basis for comparison, but I guess that in many ways I live in a different world.”
But Hoven’s world is getting larger. In the last 10 years, 17 women in Naperville have given birth to triplets, including nine women within a seven-mile radius of Hoven’s residence.
Although the triplet rate is growing nationwide, the Naperville area has the largest number of triplets per square mile, according to Maureen Boyle, director of Mothers of Super Twins (MOST), a Brentwood, N.Y.-based resource for mothers of multiples.
But despite speculation, there’s nothing in the water. According to a study by Dr. Barbara Luke of Rush Presbyterian-St. Luke’s Medical Center in Chicago, the frequency of triplets nationwide increased from 1 in 3,323 in 1973 to 1 in 1,341 in 1990. The growth is due in part to the fact that women over 35 are more likely to have multiple-births naturally, coupled with the increased use of fertility drugs, which also increase the likelihood of such an event.
“It’s really no great mystery,” Hoven said. “The demographics seem to be here, with a lot of young couples starting families in Naperville. And in Illinois, health insurance will pay for some infertility treatments. That wasn’t the case in other states where we lived.”
But while all the mothers in the Naperville area are open about the fact that the triplets were conceived as a result of fertility treatments, they downplay its importance in the experience of pregnancy and motherhood.
“It doesn’t matter how the children got here,” Kerri Hosper said as she and other group members discussed their joys and woes during a meeting at Hoven’s home. “What matters is that they’re here and they’re healthy, and we’re having a lot of fun with them.”
But getting healthy triplets here requires some work beyond the basic challenges of pregnancy.
“The stress on your body is completely different,” said Carolyn Poicaro, mother of 17-month-old triplets and a 3-year-old son. “You have to realize that three 3-pound babies does not equal one 9-pound baby. The doctors definitely want you to gain more weight, have more checkups and get more rest.”
In fact, rest is a key factor in a successful triplet pregnancy. The added weight (doctors recommend gaining 60 to 80 pounds for a triplet pregnancy compared with 25 to 35 for a single baby) makes bed rest a requirement for most triplet mothers, beginning in the second trimester. Without bed rest, because of the large weight gain the mother’s body will often go into spontaneous early labor, one of the primary causes of birth defects and infant mortality in multiple births.
According to John Gianopoulos, chief of obstetrics and director of the Division of Maternal and Fetal Medicine at Loyola University’s Foster-McGaw Medical Center in Maywood, triplets have the best rate of survival when the gestation period reaches 34 weeks, compared to the average 40-week period for single babies. Gianopoulos said it is also important for mothers of multiples to deliver at state-designated perinatal centers, facilities that are properly equipped to support multiple and premature births. Loyola is one of just five state-designated perinatal centers in the Chicago area, along with Northwestern Medical Center, the University of Chicago Hospitals’ Lying-In Center, the University of Illinois Medical Center and Rush-Presbyterian St. Luke’s Medical Center.
“By 34 weeks, most triplet babies have a 98 percent chance of not just surviving but leading healthy, normal lives,” Gianopoulos said. He downplays studies that strike fear in the hearts of expectant triplet parents by portraying triplet pregnancies and births as disasters.
“There is an increase in birth defects and infant mortality in multiple births, and we are obligated to be honest with the parents about these risks,” he said. “But with good prenatal care, advances in medication and developments in neonatal procedures, the odds of having healthy triplet babies are overwhelmingly in the parents’ favor.”
But delivery of healthy triplets is just the first part of the puzzle in parenting these children. Once the babies arrive, the challenges are much like those of parenting any child, only in triplicate.
There are always those extra precautions that are especially important to triplet moms. You can’t miss the small note taped above the doorbell at Hoven’s home that reads: “Please do not ring the doorbell. Knock softly! Babies are sleeping. Thank you.” The note is signed with a drawing of three smiling faces.
“Believe me, when they all finally fall asleep, you don’t want anything to wake them,” Hoven said. The women exchanged smiles and knowing glances that only a triplet mom could understand.
It was this idea of sharing the common experiences of triplet motherhood that prompted Hoven to informally organize the group nearly two years ago. Halfway through her pregnancy, Hoven and her husband moved to Naperville from Indiana, and she had few contacts in the area, certainly no other mothers of multiples. During a routine doctor’s visit, shortly after she had given birth, Hoven confessed to a nurse at Loyola that she felt alone and needed support.
“My husband and I were doing the best we could, but having three infants was really overwhelming at the beginning,” Hoven said. “The nurse suggested that maybe I needed to meet other women who knew what I was going through, and we could help each other. She was right.”
Through the nurse’s referral, Hoven discovered that not only was she not alone, she was not even alone in Naperville. Several other mothers of triplets, and mothers to be, called her at the nurse’s suggestion, and the Naperville group was born. (Since that time a second group of triplet moms who have more recently given birth has organized in Naperville.)
“The Naperville triplets group has done an excellent job of networking and supporting each other,” Boyle said. “It’s really important for mothers of multiple births to come together and share their experiences.”
“This group has been like a second family to me,” said Sandra Ecton, mother of 16-month-old triplets. “We share each other’s problems and concerns but also each other’s joys. Most new mothers seek out the support of other new mothers anyway. We just share a different set of new-mother issues.”
The issues these mothers share range from prenatal (finding a good obstetrician and later a pediatrician) to the cost of triplets (triplet strollers, for example, retail at $575, nearly six times the cost of a single stroller) to the family dynamics of having triplets.
“Triplets have a very different set of behaviors, different from a single child and different from each other,” said Anne Dunseith, mother of 17-month-old triplet girls as well as a 3 1/2-year-old daughter. “People often assume that you just have three babies with the same personality, but that’s not true at all. It’s more like having three separate children who just happen to be the same age.”
Which brings a whole new set of challenges. All the mothers agreed that super organization, including keeping a written log, is a key to making the most of the triplet experience.
“Color coding is a big help at a young age,” said Joanne Adler, a registered nurse with 7-year-old triplets and a 5-year-old son. “It’s the best way to keep track of how much each baby has eaten or how many diapers each child has gone through that day.”
“It’s also a big help when a cup comes flying through the air,” Hoven said, laughing. “At least you don’t have to guess who threw it.”
Of course, color coding can have its downside. Adler said that it took awhile for her children to realize that they didn’t have to live in a color-specific world. “When the kids got to be around 3 or 4 years of age, we had to tell them that it was okay to drink out of different colored cups, especially in restaurants or friends’ homes.”
If life in the triplet lane is in fact just different, imagine doubling the experience. Since it was first organized, the Naperville triplets group has inadvertently received a flurry of national publicity for an even more unusual story. Member Rhonda Houillon was, until very recently, the only mother in the United States to give birth to two surviving sets of triplets.
“It’s amazing how the word spread,” said Houillon, whose triplets are 9 years old and 9 months old. “We were on the `Today’ show and featured in Woman’s Day magazine. We even had `Primetime Live’ camped out with us for a month. But it was great fun for everyone. My older girls especially enjoyed it.”
Seeing triple does, in fact, seem to extend to the triplets themselves. Houillon said that when she and her husband told the older girls they would soon be having triplet siblings, they offered to help out by each “adopting” one of the new babies.
“I can’t imagine being a single child,” said 9-year-old Nichole.
“I feel lucky,” Jill chimed in. “Not everyone has all these sisters.”
And triplet Laura added that she can’t wait until the younger triplets–two girls and a boy–are old enough to play.
Houillon, like the other triplet moms, feels more thankful than overwhelmed. “At one point in my life, I was almost positive that I would never be a mother,” she said. “Now I have six wonderful children, and I feel very fortunate.”
It is this feeling of gratitude that prompted the group to participate in last month’s annual March of Dimes walkathon. “We are all very fortunate to have healthy children,” Hoven said. “But we know that one reason we have been so lucky is because of the prenatal research done by groups like the March of Dimes.”
Next to healthy babies and supportive husbands, the mothers agreed that networking with other triplet moms has been one of their greatest joys.
“When I had my first set of triplets nine years ago, I felt very different. I didn’t have the support of a group of triplet moms like this, and it has made all the difference in the world,” Houillon said. “No matter how wonderful your husband and family are or what type of outside help you may find, there is always a point when you are going to be alone with three babies, and that can be scary. But the friendship and support I’ve found in this group has made the triplet experience more joyful than anything. I know that I’m never really alone.”
———-
For privacy and safety reasons, many parents of multiples have unlisted telephone numbers. Triplet mothers who want to find a network in their area can begin by contacting the Triplet Connection at 209-474-0885 or MOST (Mothers of Super Twins) at 516-434-6678.
