Dear Ann Landers: I am not a famous politician or a member of the British royal family. I’m just one of the millions of women you have written about over the years who cheated on their husbands.
I was luckier than most. I have a wonderful man who was able to forgive me. We have two beautiful children and are a truly happy family.
To the outside world, I have it all, but the path I chose affected those I love most. I live with the knowledge that I broke one of the Ten Commandments as well as my wedding vows. I also live with the pain of having hurt some very decent people. I fear that my children may one day learn of my infidelity and think less of me. I hope that from this point on, my behavior will make up for my past indiscretions, even though nothing can wash away the shame.
I want to share what I have learned. Please urge your readers to talk with their spouses at the first sign of trouble and seek counseling from a competent source. Encourage them to keep their children in the forefront of their thoughts at all times. Caution them to appreciate what they have and not risk losing it. Whatever the gain, it isn’t worth it.
There are no book contracts or movie deals for my story. I am nobody special, just an anonymous woman who cheated on her husband, someone ordinary people can identify with. If you publish my letter, maybe I can make a difference.
Atlanta
Dear Atlanta: I can assure you that your letter WILL make a difference. Mission accomplished. Thank you for writing.
DINING COMPANION LOSES HER APPETITE
Dear Ann Landers: What can one say to a friend whose table manners are repulsive? This woman is lovely in every way, but she sloshes food in her mouth, smacking, slurping and chomping like a washing machine. She puts her elbows on the table, hunches over her plate and shoves the food in with her fingers. She talks incessantly, offering a wide view of her half-chewed food and intermittently licks her fingers. Every so often, she uses a fingernail to dislodge a chunk of whatever she is eating from between her teeth.
I once nicely said, “It is not considered polite to lick your fingers.” She replied, “My father always said it’s OK to lick your fingers if you do it with elegance.” I was too horrified to respond. Evidently, she thinks licking her fingers gracefully is a sign of refinement.
This woman is quite attractive, intelligent and friendly, and I feel sorry for her because so many people are revolted by her eating habits. Any advice?
Nauseated in Illinois
Dear Nauseated: Shop with her. Visit on the phone. Maintain your friendship, but avoid eating with her whenever possible. Her eating habits are well-established, and she’s not going to change.
Dear Ann Landers: This is about the woman who has been married to a cross-dresser for 25 years. He was always getting into her lingerie drawer, and she was terribly upset. Has she ever tried wearing clothes that are too tight? Well, I have, and it’s miserable.
She should buy her husband some lovely silk and lace underwear in HIS size, and he will then leave her undies alone.
Voice of Experience in La Jolla, Calif.
Dear Voice: I hear you loud and clear. Let’s hope all the cross-dressers and their spouses did too.
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Ann Landers’ booklet, “Nuggets and Doozies,” has everything from the outrageously funny to the poignantly insightful. Send a self-addressed, long, business-size envelope and a check or money order for $5.25 (this includes postage and handling) to: Nuggets, c/o Ann Landers, P.O. Box 11562, Chicago, Ill. 60611-0562. (In Canada, send $6.25.)
