Interviewing the Rolling Stones, you can’t always get what you want. Promoting their live Madison Square Garden concert at 8 p.m. Saturday on HBO, the Stones took questions from U.S. TV critics in L.A. via satellite last week, creating a new meaning for the phrase meeting of the minds.” Try not to suffer any brain damage as you read the following partial transcript:
Q: What’s the difference between you and other 1960s bands where so many of the members have died?
Keith Richards: We’re alive.
Q: So much has been written about you. Has any of it seemed at all profound?
Mick Jagger: Very little.
Ron Wood: I can’t think of one thing.
Richards: (peering at critics, puzzled) You must have a reason to exist.
Q: How will your show in Houston on Jan. 25 differ from the one on HBO?
Richards: It’ll be a few days later.
Q: Are any of you envious of Ozzy Osbourne?
Richards: Have you ever seen Ozzy?
Q: How did you decide on your sound?
Richards: We flipped a coin.
Q: Is Bill Wyman absolutely retired? Is there any way he could play with you again?
Richards: He could come back as a funeral director.
