I will not get caught up in the Super Bowl hype, although you have to agree with me when I say this Sunday’s game is going to be the biggest event in the history of mankind.
Yes, bigger than the Madonna-Britney kiss, although it’s true I’ll watch that tape far more than I will the tape of this game.
But I digress.
What I’m saying is, the Super Bowl is a time for coming together; it’s a unifying force, if you will, that brings men and women and anyone else together for nine hours one Sunday a year.
If I had a gospel choir behind me right now, they’d be cranking it up. Instead, I have a coffee table and a TV blaring a “Magnum P.I.” that I have seen five times already. Get him, Higgy baby.
Again, I digress.
Nielsen researchers asked you people this question this fall: “Which pro sports do you typically watch on television?”
And 78 percent of those polled said the NFL. Bravo. Of course, 15 percent of you said golf, so shame on you. The NFL set a record in 2003 with 16,913,944 in total regular-season attendance.
What does it all mean? I dunno. I have painters at my place this week, and the fumes are making me dizzy.
If I digress one more time, slap my fanny with a newspaper. I kind of like it.
And here now, one single pick.
MATCHUP
Carolina (14-5) vs. New England (16-2)
5:25 p.m.
WBBM-Ch. 2
LAST TIME
On Jan. 6 2002, the Patriots annihilated the Panthers 38-6, but that was a long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.
WATCH YOUR STEP
Was anyone else amazed that the Panthers won the NFC title game by throwing just 14 times? I wasn’t. The Panthers attack depends on running backs Stephen Davis and DeShaun Foster, who carry the hopes of Carolina. We know Pats QB Tom Brady has wide receivers, but I don’t think he knows that. Running back Kevin Faulk’s 48 catches are second on the team.
KEEP SCRATCHING
If this comes down to special teams, the Pats kicker has won a Super Bowl with a kick while the Panthers kicker is the last guy around from the Panthers’ expansion team in 1995. Advantage, Pats. Both have nice defenses, and by “nice” I mean they’ll rip your heart out and feed it to the fish. The Panthers have won seven games by three points or less, four in overtime. The Pats have won 14 straight. One more bit of info: The Patriots will be the home team. They will use the West bench. And they will wear the dark jerseys. You can figure out the Panthers just through deduction.
THE LINE
Pats by 7
OVER/UNDER
39
FINAL SHAKE
All week you’ve been wondering if Whizzer goes Panthers or Pats. You’ve been looking for a clue, a hint, a sign. And yet, the answer has been right under your nose all along. Whizzer doesn’t like cats. Go Pats.
Predicted final score: 23-13
Predicted game-time temperature on the field: 59 degrees.
That’s it. I’m done. Scram.
———-
Edited by the Sports staff of RedEye.
