Sent: Wednesday, 10:56 AM
From: Malcolm, Chris
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
Just finished my fantasy football draft: I wound up with Carmen Electra, Pam Anderson and Cameron Diaz. Still need a kicker, though.
Sent: Wednesday, 11:09 AM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
At least you’re all set on tight ends.
Sent: Wednesday, 12:18 PM
From: Malcolm, Chris
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
I should get a fee for setting you up like this. You in a football league? Nerd.
Sent: Wednesday, 12:22 PM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
No fantasy football for me anymore, but great story. About 10 years ago, I interned at Pro Football Weekly, and we had our draft at some joint nearby. The waiter sidled over to the editors, who he didn’t know were some of the most knowledgeable football experts anywhere and advised them on who to take. That still cracks me up.
Sent: Wednesday, 12:24 PM
From: Malcolm, Chris
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
Any geek can be an instant expert. It’s like the stock market with a safety net.
Sent: Wednesday, 12:58 PM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
Now fantasy baseball, that is for the true geek, which I proudly am. Not that I’ll finish in the money this year. Should never have taken Augie Ojeda with my first pick.
Sent: Wednesday, 1:02 PM
From: Malcolm, Chris
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
Other fantasy leagues using …?
Sent: Wednesday, 1:04 PM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
… TV news anchors. Get points each time their teeth blind the viewer; lose points when hair is out of place. Tough business.
Sent: Wednesday, 1:10 PM
From: Malcolm, Chris
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
Rosters get one network, three cable, a sports and maybe a weather guy. Make sure to have at least one sports guy. Bonus points for meaningless banter, but then you know more about that than I would. Back to you, Jim.
Sent: Wednesday, 1:15 PM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
Thanks Chip. In other news, ALIENS HAVE LANDED! But first, a report on some donkeys who have started their very own fantasy football league. And they’re not just horsing around.
Sent: Wednesday, 1:21 PM
From: Malcolm, Chris
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
Sports on TV rules our lives, it really does.
I have to not let that happen. Hey, that would be a good idea for a TV show: A sports guy who lets a talking TV run his life.
Sent: Wednesday, 1:24 PM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
Pitch it and have Jason Alexander play the sports guy so it can be canceled right away.
Sent: Wednesday,
1:25 PM
From: Malcolm, Christopher A.
To: Greenfield, Jimmy
Too late. Just got canceled. Best sports guy ever on TV or the movies? Max Mercy from “The Natural.” Don’t argue with me.
Sent: Wednesday, 1:37 PM
From: Greenfield, Jimmy
To: Malcolm, Chris
“The Natural” is the most overrated sports movie ever. I’ll go with John Sayles playing Ring Lardner in “Eight Men Out.” When he walks through the train and sings, “Forever throwing ballgames,” it still gives me chills.
———-
Chime in and e-mail Jimmy
(jgreenfield@tribune.com) and Chris (ccmalcolm@tribune.com).
