NEW BOOK
– “How to Negotiate Like a Child: Unleash the Little Monster Within to Get Everything You Want,” by Bill Adler Jr., Amacom, $17.95
Do kids know just what buttons to push, or do parents just give in to their kids? Parents give in because kids know how to push the right buttons.
These well-timed button-pushing principles of kid-inspired negotiation will trigger “I give” responses from those across the table.
There are two types of kid-inspired negotiating techniques: childish and childlike. Businesspeople may have trouble dealing with the childish, because they may see it as unprofessional. But throwing a temper tantrum works at times for Bill Gates, and trying a wild and scary threat, like building the ugliest structure on Manhattan, worked for Donald Trump.
On the childlike front, a winner is: “Pretend You Don’t Hear or Understand What the Other Side is Saying.”
If you play dumb-like-a-fox, you have to play it from the get-go.
The basis for this tactic is to have the other side waste time clarifying, explaining and defending its position as the deadline looms. With the deadline approaching and the deal on the line, you experience an “Aha moment” and push for closure.
–Jim Pawlak, BizBooks
NEW BOOK
– “Dealing With Difficult People,” editors’ compilation, Harvard Business School Press, $14.95
Reading a number of these essays reminded me of something I learned as a manager at a Ford Motor subsidiary: “It’s not my monkey.”
Many employees expect a manager to solve their problems (i.e. take their monkey off their back). Managers view them as “difficult” because they take the monkey instead of saying, “It’s not my monkey” and offering suggestions on how to find solutions.
Another common thread in the essays deals with knowing your “hot buttons” and ensuring that no one activates them, no matter how hard they’re pushed.
Truly difficult people thrive on emotional confrontation. It validates their I’m-being-singled-out position; it may give them an ear with the human resources department.
–Jim Pawlak, BizBooks
