The holidays are a time for sharing. We ran out of fruitcake, so here’s Whizzer and chicagosports.com’s Rahula Strohl. Visit us at redeyechicago.com/fiveonfive.
Jimmy Greenfield
Phillip Thompson
Leo Ebersole
Rahula Strohl
Whizzer
TOPIC 1: WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH ALLEN IVERSON?
Send him to the Knicks to waste away with Steve Francis and Stephon Marbury.
If you can’t find any takers in the NBA, I’m sure Sox GM Ken Williams would be interested.
Trade him to the Kings so he and Ron Artest can form the scariest musical duo since Milli Vanilli.Bench him for wearing aheadband.
Allen Iverson’s name rearranged is “A snivel(ing) loner.”
TOPIC 2: WHAT’S YOUR PERSONAL SCENARIO FOR CLINCHING A PLAYOFF BERTH?
If I ridicule Phil one more time I clinch the Five on Five North title.
On this road trip to New Orleans I’m hoping I’ll win the Girls-Gone-Wild-Card.
I’m looking at a wild-card in the Degenerate Division. The Bengals are on fire right now.
Make sure I’m in a league with Phil, Jimmy and Leo. Should have that wrapped up by the Solstice.
Little setback in my poker tourney, but I have a plan. I just need $50,000 from you for the buy-in.
TOPIC 3: WHAT WOULD BE A WASTE OF MONEY FOR THE CUBS?
Paying a hitting coach. Three words: “Tom Emanski video.”
Spending $300 million and not getting Barry Bonds. If you’re going to bomb, go nuclear.
Switching from ivy to chinchilla.
I can tell you what would be a waste of money for Cubs fans.
The eggnog latte. Yick.
TOPIC 4: BEFORE THE MONDAY NIGHT GAME, PREDICT WHAT HEADLINE YOU’LL READ ON TUESDAY.
“Phil Thompson eliminated from RedEye Fantasy Football League.” And that’s a clincher!
“Squeaky win gets Griese”
“REX-ISTANCE IS FUTILE!”
“When I get that feelin’, I want Rexual Healing.”
“Bears dodge Rams”
TOPIC 5: WHAT GUEST WOULD YOU INVITE TO FIVE ON FIVE AND WHY?
The first person who IMs me today at “redeyeblog” and makes me laugh out loud.
Michael Irvin. I’ve been told ignorance is bliss and I want to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth.
Definitely not Rahula–oh, hey, you’re here! I was just saying I’d invite Shannon Sharpe.
Keira Knightley. Reason should be obvious.
Stephen Colbert. Yeah, you’re a star, Steve-O, but I can make you a STAH!
