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RedEye staffer Chris Courtney joined the Fivers after the Bears’ big win. But we’ll just refer to him as “Obnoxious Colts Fan.”

TODAY’S QUESTIONS

TOPIC 1: MAKE UP A WORD TO DESCRIBE YOUR EMOTIONS ABOUT THE BEARS GAME.

Jimmy Greenfield: “Miamiohmy.”

Phillip Thompson: “Halastrophic.”

Leo Ebersole: “Amaz-ertained.”

Obnoxious Colts Fan: “Goodie4u4now.”

Bag Boy: “SoHappyICouldCryami.”

TOPIC 2: WERE THE SAINTS ROBBED IN ANY WAY?

Jimmy Greenfield: I knew they were out of town so I sent my crew to N.O. to clean them out.

Phillip Thompson: Sorry, Bears fans, but that Saints fumble–no, not the black van. NOT THE BLACK VAN!

Leo Ebersole: Nope. The Bears WERE who they THOUGHT THEY WERE.

Obnoxious Colts Fan: Think of it this way, the Bears saved you the heartache of losing to the Colts.

Bag Boy: Do. You. Want. To. Die. … Slow like.

TOPIC 3: THEY WON, SO MAKE SUPER BOWL PLANS FOR ONE OF THE BEARS.

Jimmy Greenfield: Lovie Smith will moon a local radio station.

Phillip Thompson: Rex Grossman seeks treatment for a sprained hand after giving Chicago the finger for two weeks.

Leo Ebersole: Devin Hester gets the University of Miami to host the Bears. Half the team ends up in jail.

Obnoxious Colts Fan: Bears ‘D’ physically carries Rex to Miami, but he still manages to have his luggage intercepted.

Bag Boy: Inspired by South Beach, Virginia McCaskey makes thongs part of the uniform.

TOPIC 4: OUR GUYS MADE A PRE-GAME PREDICTION FOR THE AFC. HERE THEY ARE …

Jimmy Greenfield: Winner beats the Bears. Damn, there I go again.

Phillip Thompson: A Tom Brady fumble bounces off a four-leaf clover and is picked up by a leprechaun for a touchdown.

Leo Ebersole: Peyton Manning leaves for 15 minutes in the third quarter to shoot a TV commercial.

Obnoxious Colts Fan: Please, home in the Dome? Colts by 14 … Or maybe just 3 … I can’t look.

Bag Boy: Dolts fan here will have to change his shorts. We have a history with the Patriots.

TOPIC 5: WHAT CURRENT MOVIE TITLE DESCRIBES SOMETHING ABOUT THE BEARS-SAINTS GAME?

Jimmy Greenfield: “Dreamgirls.”

Phillip Thompson: “Stomp the Yard.” Not sure how it applies, but it sounds right.

Leo Ebersole: “Dreamgirls”–right after the Reggie Bush TD when Saints fans believed they had a shot.

Obnoxious Colts Fan: Definitely “Happy Feet.” Did you see how they all slipped around on that ragged field?

Bag Boy: “The Pursuit of Happyness.”

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Get in on the action at redeyechicago.com/fiveonfive