We’ve all done it.
Company is coming, almost to the front door — so we hide dirty dishes in the laundry hamper, push unsightly rugs into closets.
Chicago is in much the same situation, with the International Olympic Committee visiting the city Thursday.
So here are some last-minute quick fixes to beautify our fair city.
1. Dress those ubiquitous Greenpeace petitioners in police uniforms. Not only is it stylish, but it also makes us look more security-conscious.
2. Spray paint the pigeons white. Hey, the Chinese painted everything when they hosted, and who wouldn’t love a city full of Olympic doves?
3. Send former Gov. Rod Blagojevich out of town, on a mission to find [bleeping] gold medals.
4. Ask U.S. Atty. Patrick Fitzgerald, politely, not to announce any federal indictments this week.
5. Rename Willis Tower. Call it Sears Tower. Just for laughs.
6. Complimentary city maps. For cab drivers.
7. Have all CTA station announcements re-recorded by James Earl Jones.
8. Make Ronnie Woo Woo the official airport greeter — for Rio de Janeiro.
9. Fill the potholes with marshmallow Peeps.
10. Hire Bill Kurtis to translate for the mayor — Bridgeport English to English.
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