Slipping up on a promise to change doesn’t have to mean giving up. Here are tips from counselors on getting your mindset back into the right place:
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Don’t beat yourself up.
Making big changes in your life is “really hard,” says Sharon Silverberg, a counselor with Rising Tide Therapy in Virginia Beach, Va. “Many times you are going against what you’ve always done. It’s OK to make mistakes.”
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Eliminate the word “only.”
Did you vow to walk five days a week but “only” did three, or “only” lost a half-pound a week instead of two? Instead of focusing on the negative, celebrate the accomplishment: several days of walking and weight lost. Never minimize progress, however small.
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Break down a resolution.
If your goal suddenly feels overwhelming, then set smaller targets. Want to stop eating fast food? Reduce your weekly trips by one day at a time — not all at once.
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Get support.
Admit to family and friends that you’re struggling with your resolution and ask for help. Also look into online support groups.
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Think about why you slipped.
Maybe you went into a bar where you always smoked, ate with a friend who pressures you into ordering dessert or aren’t getting enough sleep. Find your red flags and work to avoid them.
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Focus on one resolution.
While many people set multiple goals, it’s easier to direct your energy toward one that’s very important to you.
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Talk to yourself each morning.
Remember why you set a goal and think about what specifically you can do that day to help meet it.
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Don’t expect perfection.
Aim to be “good enough” — and understand that willpower builds over time.
