We know what Ichabod Crane’s last meal was, the last things he ate before, you know, his head was taken, ripped from his body by a ghost on a demon steed. Presumably; the body was never found. Before this, Washington Irving bestows a bounty at the feet of his “Legend of Sleepy Hollow” hero; he has this long-necked dandy riding his horse to dinner through Northeast fields that surround him with apples gathered in baskets and heaped in piles of mush for making cider, vast rows of Indian corn and yellow pumpkins beneath them — “the treasures of jolly autumn.”
At that evening’s party, Ichabod, something of an opportunistic bore, finds himself agog: Not only are there doughnuts, crullers and booze, but also “sweet cakes and short cakes, ginger cakes and honey cakes … apple pies, and peach pies, and pumpkin pies; besides slices of ham and smoked beef; and moreover delectable dishes of preserved plums, and peaches, and pears, and quinces; not to mention broiled shad and roasted chickens; together with bowls of milk and cream.” Irving refers to it as a “genuine Dutch country tea-table.”
A remarkable feast, assuming you overlook the ghoulish fact that Ichabod isn’t aware it’s his last.
But what if you did know what you could have for your last meal? For instance, an eight-eyed, fanged, tentacled walleye is having you for breakfast, and you know this and can order one final meal? Or perhaps zombies are scraping at your door, craving your brains, but for you, at least for an hour or so, there’s reliable takeout!
Also, let’s assume you are not sitting on death row in Texas, where state prison officials recently decided not to honor last meal requests after a September execution in which, before being put to death, an inmate ordered two chicken-fried steaks with gravy; a cheese omelet with jalapenos; a triple-patty bacon cheeseburger; a bowl of fried okra with ketchup; one pound of barbecued meat with half a loaf of bread; a pizza; a pint of ice cream; three fajitas; three root beers; and peanut-butter fudge covered in crushed peanut.
Then did not eat it.
So, shivers aside, we asked a handful of local restaurateurs, chefs and foodie celebrities for their last meals.
Rick Bayless, chef/owner, Frontera Grill: “Before becoming a true part of Day of the Dead, I would want to celebrate my last meal with mariachis, mescal and mole. I am not particularly fond of alliteration, but come on — that works perfectly for my last moments on earth.”
Anthony Beckham, co-owner, Le Fleur de Lis: “It would be a nice steak with some gumbo and mashed potatoes and a piece of bread pudding.”
Tory McPhail, executive chef, Commander’s Palace, New Orleans: “I’d probably order a hot French dip sandwich with melted, stringy provolone cheese, truffled parmesan fries and warm chocolate brownies. Or maybe spiced apple pie with old-fashioned vanilla ice cream made from an antique salted ice pail just like grandma used to make on hot summer afternoons. On third thought, I’d order eight more lives, because the one I’m living is so much freakin’ fun, that I can’t imagine how bored I’ll be when I die.”
Alpana Singh, sommelier, host of “Check, Please”: “Whenever I hear people get asked this question, I read the answers and wonder what it would be for me, but it would depend on how I was going out. It would be the ultimate comfort food. Or are you resigned to it? If it happened right now , I would not be OK with it. There are things I still want to do! That said, rice would be involved. It’s my comfort food. My mother’s crab curry. I grew up in Monterey (Calif.).
We could always tell how good the company was depending on what my mother cooked. A base of onions and garlic, then curry paste. It’s not a meal you would eat right away. So it would prolong my dying, right? The deliciousness, sweetness of the crab, the spiciness of the curry. Then she adds fresh cilantro. It’s a Singaporean-style dish. Other than that, if I had more time, I’d enjoy a good tuna melt. Tomato and American cheese, but no relish in the tuna. What would I drink? We’re not typically drinking anything with a curry. But an Alsace Riesling. I’ve always thought of it as my desert-island wine.”
Christine Cikowski, chef, underground supper club Sunday Dinner: “It would be at Pok Pok in Portland, Ore. — a Thai restaurant, a very authentic Thai restaurant. I want chicken wings. I want chicken soup with crispy noodles. Papaya salad and glass noodles with pork. And any cocktail on the menu. It holds a lot of nostalgia for me. It was part of a trip I took when I was younger and has a lot of significance. That’s what I would want to eat on my last day. It feels like coming home there, and I have never lived there.”
Keegan Gerhard, pastry chef/owner, D Bar Desserts, Denver: “My last meal would be Kraft mac and cheese with Blue Bell cookies-and-cream ice cream and Mountain Dew.”
Dan Raskin, co-owner, Manny’s Cafeteria & Delicatessen: “My first course would be surf and turf, and my main dish would be crab legs from Joe’s with a corned beef and pastrami combo from Manny’s. Then my dessert would be the carrot cake from Hub 51.”
Sean Brock, executive chef, McCrady’s and Husk, Charleston, S.C.: “My family’s chicken and dumplings with a plate of sliced, ripe tomatoes, a black skillet full of Benton’s bacon and wilted ramps, some killed lettuce, a raw banana pepper, my grandma’s pickle beans, some of her pone bread, the outside crunchy edges of the Husk cornbread, and some hoppin’ John made with my grandma’s wild goose beans and Charleston gold rice, and the biggest glass of 15-year-old Pappy Van Winkle ever consumed.”
Bill Kim, chef/owner, Urban Belly: “I know exactly what it would be. It would be two things. In the Korean culture, for New Year’s Day, we eat a rice cake and dumpling soup. It’s one of the things that I love and what I remember loving as a kid. And when I go to mother’s, she always asks what I want to eat, and though she doesn’t make it — Korean blood sausage. We have tried to replicate it (at Urban Belly). It’s made with pork butt and belly. Basically, I would want things from my childhood, things that recall a time when there was nothing to worry about and you didn’t have to think about paying rent or if employees will show up. You know, just feeling that all you do is eat and sleep. As I get older, I think more about that than my career.”
Stephanie Izard, chef/partner, Girl & the Goat: “Toro, fatty tuna. With a side of french fries and ranch dressing (to pour over the fries).”
Josh Skenes, chef/owner, Saison, San Francisco: “I would run through Tsukiji Market (in Tokyo), grabbing live sea creatures at random and biting chunks from them. Best buffet on earth. Or, I would eat at Sukiyabashi Jiro in Tokyo.”
Nicolas Ibarzabal, co-owner, food truck 5411 Empanadas: “It’s going to be an Argentine meal. It is called milanesas, a very thin, breaded steak. With an order of french fries. It’s what I have loved all my life, ever since I was a kid. I would have it with a nice red wine from Argentina. If I had it every single day, I wouldn’t mind. For dessert, bananas with dulche de leche, but for the caramel in it, the real deal, not what you get here, in this country, for caramel. I would be dying in Chicago but my heart would be dying in Argentina.”
Tony Maws, chef/owner, Craigie’s On Main, Cambridge, Mass. “Tough one. Either a Speed Dog (from Speed’s Hot Dogs in Boston) or a real hot pastrami sandwich, piled high, great deli mustard, dark rye bread.”
Paul Kahan, chef/partner, Blackbird: “This changes all the time. I’m totally in love with Great Lake pizza. So a margherita pizza from Great Lake, a great bottle of red wine and the company of my wife. I’m a simple guy.”
