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Chris Sosa: … like playing TWO rounds of golf. |
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Matt Pais: … so cold. So very, very cold. Sorry, I’m at Forever Yogurt. What’d you say? |
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Grant Yanney: I’m indifferent, if this question was prefaced without mention of my White Sox … #TakeJake. |
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Kat Velez: … like it’s my birthday. Oh wait, it IS! |
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Ben Johnson: … like driving on the Dan Ryan or walking down Clark Street. |
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Chris Sosa: Derrick Rose’s crutches. Keep up the good work! |
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Matt Pais: The parking attendant who didn’t arrive to issue a ticket when I went over by three minutes. Thanks! |
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Grant Yanney: A.J. Pierzynski. Honorable mention to my dog Nala. She’s a pitbull/lab mix. |
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Kat Velez: Patrick Sharp. Last Chicago guy to win an MVP award at an All-Star game, you know. |
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Ben Johnson: Your cousin who’s not using his old window unit A/C. |
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Chris Sosa: The Bench Mopes. Don’t worry, fellas, D-Rose and Luol Deng will be back eventually. |
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Matt Pais: Cap’n Geech and the Shrimp Shack Shooters. Best name for anything ever. |
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Grant Yanney: The Raging Bull? Some players shouldn’t have been brought back for the ride. |
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Kat Velez: The _e_ _h Mob. |
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Ben Johnson: The “continue to not be Derrick Rose” mob. |
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Chris Sosa: Someone has to help LeBron carry those increased expectations. |
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Matt Pais: A championship team in a nice climate and eye candy-filled beaches? No idea. |
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Grant Yanney: Pat Riley offers players a vial of life potion upon signing. No yolo! |
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Kat Velez: It’s like they want to join a championship team or something! |
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Ben Johnson: There’s so much attention on LeBron, the rest of the team is like basketball’s witness protection program. |
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Chris Sosa: Judging by drinking habits, they must have some sort of connection to Leinenkugel’s. |
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Matt Pais: Insert joke about cheese, then insert joke about Green Bay as a whole. Hooray, stereotypes! |
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Grant Yanney: Muenster cheese is on a serious come-up! |
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Kat Velez: What else is there to do in Green Bay? |
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Ben Johnson: They’re exempt from the concussion lawsuit thanks to their long tradition of cheese-lined helmets. |
