Where did the first caveman take the first cavewoman on their first date? It must have been to dinner, maybe a main course of mastodon steak and ferns for an appetizer. Eating and dating have always gone together; it`s a subject everyone has a story about.
— ”I`ve got eating in a restaurant when I`m on a date down to a science,” a 31-year-old single woman tells us. ”I gauge my nervousness and, depending on how I feel, I determine whether I can order something requiring utensils. If I`m really jittery, I worry about shaking, so I order a hamburger or something I can eat with my hands. I have ordered soft drinks and never taken a sip from them throughout the entire meal. Why? They came without a straw and I was afraid my hand was shaking too badly to pick up the glass. If a straw is there, I can slide the drink to the edge of the table, lean down and take a sip. Without a straw, I generally don`t drink.”
— Paula, 40, remembers even now the deliberate calculations that preceded–by many years–her first date. ”I was 10 and 11 and thinking about what I would order when I was finally old enough to go out. I remember deciding on a tuna fish sandwich and a 7-Up. It seemed like the most feminine thing I could order. It`s now 30 years later and if I were with a man I really loved, I`d order a thick steak and a bottle of red wine.”
— Penny, 28 and single, had braces for three years. The little metal fences on her teeth turned dinner dates into times of high anxiety.
”I had to worry about what was sticking. After I ate I would escape to the ladies` room to clean them, but I didn`t want to open my mouth to say I was going so I would kind of mumble, `Excuse me for a minute,` with my lips drawn over my teeth.”
— In this generation where instant judgments are epidemic, restaurant behavior can be a quick turnoff. ”I went out with a doctor and ordered a sundae for dessert,” Jennifer, 25, says. ”I left a small portion on my plate. He said I shouldn`t have ordered something if I couldn`t finish it.”
Another woman was picked up at work for her third date with a man, also a doctor. He told her he had an idea.
”We walked to Rush Street,” the woman reports, ”where our dinner cost nothing. We went into two places with happy hours and free hors d`oeuvres. You know, little egg rolls and pizza squares.”
— On first dates especially, many women report that they dread the moment of ordering. The waiter looks to them first, but questions whirl through their minds: Should I order one of the two or three cheapest entrees? Will he order an appetizer?
To hear men tell it, though, many women have no such compunctions.
”It seems like most woman I date order from every course on the menu,”
George, 26, says. ”They order up a storm. And they`ll ask the waiter 50 questions. `How is this made?` Men don`t do that. Also, I`ve had women who give you a hard time if dinner is not included in a date. If you make a date for 8 or 9 o`clock, they don`t like it.”
— Dorie, a 36-year-old divorcee, keeps running into men who are on diets. To her, that`s a real turnoff.
”I was out to dinner and we went to Billy`s on Rush Street, one of my favorite restaurants. He suggested the broiled chicken and said since he was watching his weight and wasn`t really very hungry, why didn`t we split it. I said, `Okay.` When I got home, I told my daughter and her girlfriend to put on their coats and I took them to Ricky`s for hot fudge sundaes.”
TALE-ENDS
— ”I meet a lot of professional women who in the first 10 minutes of our first date get around to saying, `I don`t want to get married.` I feel like saying, `Slow down. We haven`t even ordered yet. Can we just have a drink?` ”
