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The hideous nightmare approaches. A carload of kids and no plans for the 4th of July.

But with a little forethought, you could spend a down-to-earth day watching your children mud-wrestle or look to the skies at house-sized balloons or sky divers. And you can still catch a fireworks display or two.

In Chicago, the eye of the patriotic storm is, as always, Grant Park, where fireworks by the famous Grucci family will burst overhead Friday evening in sync with a live performance of the 1812 Overture. The WFMT Folk Music Festival, featuring Joan Baez, and continuing Taste of Chicago events will delight body and soul through the weekend.

Reminiscent of Independence Days past, the Chicago Historical Society is holding an ”old-fashioned” picnic Saturday in Lincoln Park with free sausage lunches supplied by the Vienna Sausage Co. You can listen to the words that started it all at a morning reading of the Declaration of Independence.

But if you want to buck the crowds, get in your Chevy and drive beyond the city limits, here are some of the highlights of the suburban celebrations: AURORA: One of the more elaborate and expensive celebrations will be in Aurora, where enormous blow-up beasts will delight children and confuse pigeons. The festivities begin with a flea market from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Friday at the Water Street Mall, Galena Boulevard and Downer Place. On Saturday, the magic begins at 10 a.m. with a parade featuring the enormous balloons from the same company that supplies Snoopy and Bullwinkle to New York`s Thanksgiving Day Parade. The town spent $7,000 for the balloons, according to Byron Walter, the city`s civic activities coordinator. For that tidy sum, they will receive the following: an 18-foot inflatable giraffe; an 18-foot-tall rocking horse; a 45-foot Flying Saucer; and, the crowning glory of Aurora, ”Big Al,” an 85-foot-long, 25-foot-tall alligator. Saturday evening, there will be a concert of patriotic music in North River Street Park followed by a fireworks display at dusk. Walter estimates 30,000 to 35,000 people on Saturday–so bring your friends.

BROOKFIELD: The Brookfield Zoo, 31st Street and First Avenue, offers a fuzzy alternative to traditional Independence fare. ”Animals in Action,”

with a 2 and 3 p.m. show lets children and the rest of us see animals do what they do best: play competitive sports. You can watch a pig play basketball with its snout, or a horse and mule grab the ball with their teeth. Brookfield Zoo education programs supervisor Gail Mikenas said, ”The gist of the presentation is to show off the animals` natural abilities.” Well, that`s what she said.

EVANSTON: Details right out of Louis XIV`s Versailles are coming to Evanston`s Saturday night extravaganza in Dawes Park at Church Street and the lake. Fountains tinted with colored lights will float on the newly redone lagoon, while the 60-piece Palatine Concert Band plays–what else–band music at 7:30 p.m. Fireworks afterward. Earlier in the day, Chicago Bear Emery Moorehead, an Evanston native, will lead the 110-unit parade from Central Park along Central Avenue to Ashland Avenue. In this 66th-annual parade, there will be 12 bands along with the Bunco Parchesi and Weightdropping Society playing Dixieland, the wheel men on old-fashioned tall bicycles, the kazoo band and the All-Amerika Drum and Bugle Corpse (”like dead body”) that usually does

”some reasonably outrageous thing,” said City Clerk Kris Davis.

GARY: For an offbeat weekend for those who like to travel, Gary, home of U.S. Steel and the ”Music Man,” offers a celebration of political rebellion with an adolescent twist. North Gleason Park, 30th Street and Broadway, will be the site of ”22 hours of continuous entertainment,” in the words of City Council member Vernon Smith, chairman of the July 4 festivities. From noon to 11 p.m. Sunday, rock bands with names like Wind Chill Factor, Passion Mark and Fayde to Black will give audiences an idea of what freedom of expression means to them. Also on hand will be an assortment of rap and gospel music groups, as well as a fleshy display of pectorals from ”Hard Bodies,” body builders from a local health organization.

HIGHLAND PARK AND FT. SHERIDAN: If the kids don`t get sticky enough from pickle juice and spilled cola, you may want to send them through the Mud Mania Obstacle Course in Highland Park, which has joined forces with Ft. Sheridan and Highwood to throw a daylong orgy of eats, treats and feats. Follow the marching parade Saturday morning to Sunset Park for the down-and-dirty mud event at noon. Parents will be glad to know that park district workers ”hose `em down after,” said the park district`s Tom Mammoser. For the clean-at-heart, there is ragtime music from 11 a.m. to early afternoon and carnival games and food throughout. At 12:30 p.m., watch the men`s Twelve-Inch Fastpitch League play all-star softball.

The Ft. Sheridan Army Post will have music all day starting with the folkish Vigilante Band in the afternoon, Top 40 pop music at 4 p.m. with the 4th Army Band at 8 p.m. Of course, the Army band will play the 1812 Overture before $11,000 in fireworks bursts overhead. Country music until midnight. Park at the Army post on Sheridan Road north of Highland Park. Or take shuttle buses running from the K mart parking lot on Ill. Hwy. 41 and Park Avenue between 6:30 p.m. and midnight.

LISLE: Get a rise out of the Eyes to the Skies Hot Air Balloon Festival in Lisle in celebration of the town`s 20th anniversary. Balloon races are Friday and Saturday evenings and in the mornings. Things also get jumpy when sky divers say Geronimo shortly before finale fireworks on Saturday. Get back to the ground with melodies from the past with the Jimmy Dorsey Orchestra led by trumpet player Lee Castle. Everything takes place at the Lisle Park District Community Center–that`s a big park–at 1825 Short Street off Ill. Hwy. 53.

MUNDELEIN: Take a train down memory lane on Saturday when the old Soo Line railroad depot opens as the Ft. Hill Heritage Center at Noel and Countryside Drives. Memorabilia goes back to the 19th Century. A carnival and various activities Thursday through Sunday in Kracklauer Park at Seymour Avenue and Courtland Street make the trip well worth the gas. Hot-rodders will enjoy a road rally Saturday morning. Pageant queens will be chosen Thursday and Friday evenings at Mundelein High School, 1350 W. Hawley St.