This is crazy. Marlene Gordon knows it`s crazy.
”I have to be nuts to be in this business,” she says. ”You feel like you should be sleeping.”
At 3 a.m., when right-thinking Angelenos are doing just that-sleeping-Gordo n is cranking up her Insomniac`s Tour of L.A.
It`s a late, late show that attracts the curious, the crazed, the night owls, people who would rather sightsee than sleep.
”There`s special things about L.A. on the other side of midnight that I really enjoy,” she says.
Touring at so ungodly an hour has its advantages. Traffic is as bearable as L.A. gets. There`s no smog, or if there is it`s too dark to see it. You don`t need to dress way-cool because, at that hour, no one cares.
Brave the Insomniac`s Tour and you need sustenance, so an early stop is made at the Brooklyn Bagel Co. to watch bagels being born.
Where you eat the bagels depends. Could be at Union Station as Gordon lectures about its grand design and history-it was the last great railroad terminal to be built in the United States. More likely it`s at El Pueblo Park, parked under a street light, with the engine of the bus turned off.
Fury among the flowers
Next on the tour, before the California sun has even thought about coming up, comes the Los Angeles Flower Market.
On the Insomniac`s Tour you can watch buyers haggling with sellers. Prices on mums, poinsettias, roses, orchids, etc., are 50-70 percent of what you`d normally pay.
At the mammoth Los Angeles Produce Market, you can flit among the forklifts, boxes and crates of tomatoes, watermelons, bell peppers, even edible flowers. Workers feed huge semis with fruits and veggies destined for restaurants and grocery chains.
Before breakfast at an out-of-the-way cafe, Gordon takes her half-sleeping charges up 30 floors in the Transamerica building.
Sunrise from a skyscraper. Perfect.
Above the sprawl of the city the views are so breathtaking that Gordon is moved to play classical music.
Open-jawed, you can see the glass towers of Beverly Hills, the distant snow-covered mountains, Santa Monica and the Pacific Ocean.
Gordon is soft-spoken and unassuming; at 5 a.m., these are exactly the qualities you want in a tour guide. Her customers often fall asleep. One time some musicians she booked were no-shows because they overslept.
Rate of $40-$45 for the Insomniac`s Tour includes breakfast. The next will be May 30. Contact Gordon at the Next Stage, 213-WE-WANT-U (213-939-2688) anytime, or write Box 35269, Los Angeles, Calif. 90035. Ask about her underground tours of L.A., champagne tour of Beverly Hills or Santa Barbara by train.
