Mothers tell their daughters: It’s just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor one. Not because mothers are evil. They just want their daughters to have it all–love and money. But sometimes you have to choose. Which would you rather have? Love or money?
– Judy: “I became engaged to a man with a monthly income of $9,500. He was retired. He owned a home on the ocean, one in town and one on a private lake. His net worth was close to a million dollars. He gave me a diamond the size of an egg and said I could retire at 41. The problem? I didn’t love him. Once we drove to the beach condo, a four-hour drive, and we barely talked. We had nothing to say to each other. I asked myself, if the money wasn’t there, would I still be with him? The answer was obvious.”
– Toni: “I guess I’ve grown a tad cynical over the years, but I don’t believe that love lasts. The lust component of it dies. The like component turns to boredom or, worse, annoyance. The comfort component leads to laziness. So, give me money. Lots of it.”
– George: “Give me love! I’ve got a lot of grownup toys, nice car and a time-share, but I have no one to share them with. I’d give anything to be in love. My male friends think I’ve got the best life in the world because I’m single and have lots of women to choose from, but I tell them the really lucky ones are the men and women who have found each other.”
– Cynthia: “Love makes your head spin but it doesn’t pay the rent. I was madly in love with my high school sweetheart, but we ended up fighting all the time about money. Why was I only working part-time? Why was he out spending money with his friends? Why didn’t I cut all the coupons from the paper? I’ll take love, but it would help if my love had some money.”
– Carrie: “Larry and I met in 1980, and I moved in almost immediately. We were about as broke as we could be, but he worked very hard. We were very close and spent all our free time together. We were best friends. We’re married now and have children and Larry owns his own business. It takes all his time and we rarely do anything alone. But he makes quite a bit of money. I’d be happier with less money and more time, affection and love from my husband.”
– Joanne: “People who don’t have it talk as though money were the answer to everything. They wonder what’s there is to fight about if you don’t fight about money. Well, how about sex? How about values? How about selfishness and thoughtlessness? How about politics? Having enough money doesn’t make all those other little issues go away. In fact, you have more time to devote to them.”
– Gregory: “I’ll take love over money any day. I’ve dated women who make a lot of money and have found them almost invariably to be completely self-absorbed and self-important. They have a major cow if their nails chip or a waiter looks at them cross-eyed. Money gives you power, but it doesn’t give you class.”
– Ralph: “Love or money? Most assuredly love. Money comes and goes. On the other hand, love nurtures and grows forever. Love is the sacrifices you make, the giving of yourself. We need money to survive, but we need love to truly live.”
———-
How do you feel about long-distance relationships? Send your tale to Cheryl Lavin, Tales from the front, Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, Ill. 60611. Please include day and evening phone numbers. Letters may be used in whole or in part for any purpose and become the property of the column.
