Q. If a woman finds out her husband has been cheating on her after 20 years, what should she do?
A. It depends on whether she wants to remain in the relationship or if the hurt of her husband cheating is so great that she cannot continue living with him. If that’s the case, an attorney has to be consulted.
Let’s suppose that the 20 years of marriage have been productive and rewarding and she really does not want to end the relationship; then a counselor could be appropriate. When this happens in my private practice, I first tell people that they can never forget the disappointment, but I also say that in order to work this out you can’t bring it up every time there is a minor disagreement. Instead, you have to work on the positive.
I have seen many couples where either the husband or the wife has had an episode outside of the marriage and they have worked it out.
