1. Wipeout!
Oh, we all thought Olympic ice dancing would have fewer crashes than a Daytona 500. Now we know the truth, and the truth hurts.
2. 1 analogy too far
Americans Tanith Belbin and Ben Agosto won ice dancing silver. Would have been gold without that pit stop for fuel and fresh tires with seven laps to go.
3. No debate here
If you made the icy run a loop and let fans park RVs in the infield and flash the drivers, then yeah, sure, U.S. fans would love the four-man bobsled.
4. Icy reception
It’s bronze medals for the U.S. women’s hockey team. Terrific. Could’ve bought one of those on eBay.
5. Um, well, they kinda did
Of course, Canada’s women win gold, and the Canadians act like they invented the sport.
6. Need for speed
Austria’s Michaela Dorfmeister’s second downhill skiing gold makes it The Dorfmeister 2, Bode Miller 0.
7. Pour it on
Bode’s sixth place in the giant slalom goes with his previous finishes: a fifth, a DQ and an incomplete. Man, that could drive a guy to drink.
8. Olympic opponent
Even though NBC says it’ll make a profit of between $50 million and $75 million from these Games, NBC should still offer to give any U.S. viewer $10 not to watch “American Idol.”
9. Missing the point
Austria has tied the U.S. in total Olympic medals. Unreal. I mean, it’s not even winter Down Under.
FIVE MORE …
… answers to anticipated questions during women’s figure skating:
— Of course the coaches do more than hand over roses at the end.
— Yes, her name really is Irina Slutskaya.
— It takes more than “a little practice.”
— Nobody’s made the leap to the NHL. Maybe someday.
— It’s called a “kiss-and-cry” area for the skaters, not for you.
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redeyesports@tribune.com
