TODAY’S QUESTIONS
TOPIC 1: Pick the most surprising thing from the weekend tourney games.
Jimmy Greenfield: At no time did any Cubs pitcher suffer an injury.
Phillip Thompson: Candace Parker dunked in a game–twice. You didn’t say which tourney.
Leo Ebersole: The mighty George Mason Patriots. I’m convinced they hired Bill Belichick as a consultant.
Brian Moore: The inferior, small-time conferences get huge wins, earn respect. Right, Billy Packer.
Bag Boy: The Big Ten teams didn’t lose all of their first-round games.
TOPIC 2: Is it too late to climb aboard the Bradley Braves bandwagon?
Jimmy Greenfield: It’s never too late to join any kind of bandwagon. Go Whigs!
Phillip Thompson: There’s still room, you just have to move a few hayseeds. Speaking of which, Leo, you’re back!
Leo Ebersole: It’s never too late. Isn’t that right, Cubs-turned-Sox fans?
Brian Moore: Only if it’s not too late to jump off the mighty Illini’s bandwagon.
Bag Boy: Never. Peoria is like a second home for me.
TOPIC 3: Would anyone have an interest in an NCAA Hockey Final Four office pool?
Jimmy Greenfield: Sure. I’ll take Gonzaga, Zimbabwe, Simeon and Simian.
Phillip Thompson: Absolutely. My bracket has Minnesota in all four spots.
Leo Ebersole: I’m not interested in any pool that actually names the number of people who are interested in it.
Brian Moore: Sure, with only three or four people wanting in, it’s a lot easier to win.
Bag Boy: Done. I’m taking Maine to win it all, but watch out for Bemidji State.
TOPIC 4: Terrell Owens lands in Dallas. How will that work out?
Jimmy Greenfield: Heh heh. Much fun for all of us.
Phillip Thompson: After the Owens move, Satan finally agrees to coach. And he brings the handbasket.
Leo Ebersole:Lots of crying. Not from Jerry Jones, of course. His surgeons won’t allow it.
Brian Moore: T.O. wasn’t happy with Donovan McNabb, so how do you think he’ll feel about Drew Bledsoe?
Bag Boy: Remember Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton? Like that but without the vials of blood.
TOPIC 5: What should WBC finalists Japan or Cuba eventually do with the title trophy?
Jimmy Greenfield: Have it bronzed.
Phillip Thompson: Use it to make computer chips or fund the next revolution. Did I say that out loud?
Leo Ebersole: Throw it back into the fires of Mt. Doom for the good of Middle-earth.
Brian Moore: Give it to me. My three RedEye Fantasy Football League title trophies are getting lonely.
Bag Boy: Take it out in the ocean, tie it to an anvil and sink it. And let’s never speak of it again.
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