We can’t say who will be starting in Five on Five tomorrow. We’re not secretive; we just don’t put that much thought into it. Sign up at redeyechicago.com/fiveonfive.
Jimmy Greenfield
Phillip Thompson
Tracy Swartz
Rahula Strohl
Bag Boy
TOPIC 1: WHO WILL BE THE BEARS QUARTERBACK ON SUNDAY?
The answer rhymes with “Hot sex.”
Rahula Strohl. No, wait, he’s the Monday morning quarterback.
Wrecks Grossman or a Bucktown cat. Both have nine lives.
No one. Back to the Wing-T and snap it to whoever runs the ball.
Hard to go wrong with the championship QB from Florida. Everyone, meet Chris Leak.
TOPIC 2: WHY IS LOVIE SMITH WAITING UNTIL WEDNESDAY TO ANNOUNCE HIS DECISION?
He needs time to consult his astrologist.
Isn’t that trash day in some neighborhoods?
So Wednesday can now be called “Dump Day” instead of “Hump Day.”
Because the game tape needs to be reviewed by Homeland Security first.
After Sunday night’s debacle, he’ll need two days alone with his wife. I hear the Sybaris is nice.
TOPIC 3: DID ANYONE ON THE PANEL GET CUBS PLAYOFF TICKETS?
No, instead I took the money and bought a small condo.
Someone of my stature will be watching from the press box coat-check room.
I saw Jimmy on the phone breathing hard. But that may have been for his other job.
I know the Cubs better than to assume they’ll make it.
Tough call. It was either playoff tickets or send the kids to college. Good thing they’re not that smart.
TOPIC 4: HOW DO YOU TEAR AN ACL DURING AN ARGUMENT?
The person you’re arguing with has a bat … and is 3 feet tall.
Since it happened to the Padres’ Milton Bradley, maybe he was playing a game of Twister.
It’s called makeup flex.
When I prepped to kick Phil in the shins, my plant foot got caught in the turf.
By turning the media-collateral ligament ever so … oh, you just lose your mind and do it!
TOPIC 5: WHAT TV PREMIERE ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO?
“The Brian Griese Show.”
“Journeyman.” Surprisingly, it’s not the story of a White Sox reliever.
Seems like Rex will be starring in the fall.
Still waiting on the season premiere of that high-powered Bears offense.
“Friday Night Lights.” It’s the only football team I like with a decent shot at winning every week.
