When it’s over, it’s over. We’ve all been around long enough to know when the Cubs don’t have it.
They don’t have it. Oh, sure, there were some nice wins last weekend against their AAA farm team, a.k.a. the Pittsburgh Pirates, but that’s about it. It starts and ends with the bullpen — we have none. Thank you, Kevin Gregg, for blowing a job you never should have had. Tell you what, we’ll add you to the list of guys who couldn’t cut it — including LaTroy Hawkins, Mitch Williams, Antonio Alfonseca … it goes on.
I’m curious why the Cubs think they can skimp on the closer. Either go for the aging starter coming off of arm trouble, or go for the one-time great closer who’s past his prime, or go for the setup guy who’s never done it before. Oh, well, the job goes to Carlos Marmol, who should have had it anyway.
A special thanks to Carlos Zambrano — for the honesty, that is. Carlos thinks he’s lazy — hasn’t done enough abdominal work to strengthen his back. Well, we’ll add that to the list of things you are, Carlos, including a knucklehead. Carlos is the latest to come down with what I call “Cubs disease.” That means the player actually enjoys the surroundings of Wrigley Field more than actually playing in Wrigley Field. Think Mark Grace.
Cub fans, you must look at the bright side. It looks like you’ll be spared a humiliating playoff exit. Oh, and in case you’re wondering how it’s really done — visit St. Louis, an organization with far superior management.
Another special thank you to White Sox GM Ken Williams for his honesty. Calling your team “underachievers” nails it. No one in that division has more talent than the White Sox, period. So do us a favor and turn it on here for the home stretch.
And a final thank you to Jay Cutler for his honesty. People may get bent out of shape, but he’s actually right when he says Devin Hester doesn’t really go up after balls. Hey, maybe we should have a quarterback who speaks his mind around here. It can only help.
As for Brett Favre … be afraid, be very afraid. He never had a tailback like Adrian Peterson before, so this should be scary.
