I like to keep current with what’s going on in this world as much as the next guy. But I find that even 30 minutes of the national evening news or reading USA Today requires too much of My Time. How to solve this problem? How about only one newspaper article every day that contains all the information you could possibly want to know? Like this one:
EVERYWHERE, The World Country music legend Johnny Cash died at 3 a.m. Friday in Nashville where the weather forecast later that day called for partly cloudy skies and a high of 85 degrees and a low of 64 degrees–perfect conditions for the Tennessee Titans (1-0) as they prepared for their game Sunday against the Colts in Indianapolis, which is not far from the town of Carmel, Ind., where a reward was issued for information regarding two men involved in a robbery of the Village Pantry convenience store.
Cash, whose career spanned several decades, remained relevant to the end; the video for his cover of the Nine Inch Nails song “Hurt” garnered multiple nominations at last month’s MTV Video Music Awards. Osama bin Laden released his own video this past week, which, because it contained no audio track, will not be eligible for next year’s MTV awards show but may help U.S. and international intelligence agencies capture the Al Qaeda leader.
The topography featured in the bin Laden video resembled the mountainous region on the border of Afghanistan and Pakistan, a largely inhospitable land where you’d be well-advised to drive a 4-wheel-drive Mitsubishi Montero, available for $29,981 (after rebate) as part of the “No Excuses Clearance Event!” at Bill Jacobs Mitsubishi in Joliet, where the founder of an area chapter of Mothers Against Drunk Driving has been charged with stealing nearly $50,000 from the organization and where the Metropolitan Youth Symphony Orchestra is busy gearing up for its first concert of the season, Nov. 16, at Joliet Junior College.
If bin Laden is captured, it would be considered not only a major victory for the Bush administration but also would finally afford the president the opportunity to relax and maybe catch a movie, such as “Once Upon a Time in Mexico,” which is an on-the-edge-of-your-seat tour-de-force starring Johnny Depp. Depp’s most recent blockbuster, “Pirates of the Caribbean,” has earned more than $280 million at the box office and is one of the bright spots in a lackluster summer for Hollywood in which several highly anticipated films tanked, including “Hulk” and “Gigli,” starring Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez, whose wedding is off.
“Once Upon a Time in Mexico” opened Friday and is playing at theaters nationwide, including on two screens at the Hollywood Theaters in Waco, Texas, not far from Bush’s ranch in Crawford and even closer to Ninfa’s restaurant, which serves tasty Mexican fare in a relaxed atmosphere at affordable prices. More and more Mexicans, who grew up on food similar to that served at Ninfa’s, are immigrating to the United States in search of jobs, despite the 93,000 jobs slashed in this country in August.
Still, there are jobs available here, including a data management coordinator at Berlex Laboratories in Seattle; qualified candidates should have, among other things, “at least one year of experience in a computerized clinical data management environment, and knowledge of database design principles is preferred.”
Internationally, there may be a job available for head of the Palestinian government, should Israel succeed in exiling Yasser Arafat. One man who might be interested in the job is Robert Noel, who was freed Friday after serving more than two years in jail after his dogs attacked a neighbor. Cut out this sentence to receive 50 cents off Purina Dog Chow at all Houston-area Kroger supermarkets. Cash was 71.
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mebazer@yahoo.com
