The NameMaster is explaining his qualifications:
”I`ve always had a bright, creative imagination. Even as a kid, I`d give people different names. Like if a `Diane` looked more like a `Ruth,` I`d tell her so. That kind of thing.
”I used to think I was a rebel-you know, different. But once I got into advertising, people started telling me how creative I was.”
The NameMaster, known to his friends as Gary Tartaglia, age 40, will stake his reputation on it. He owns a business in Cleveland he has named NameMasters Inc. If you have a whatchamacallit in need of a snappy name, the NameMaster will generate one.
Sure, it`ll cost you, from $2,000 to $5,000, depending on how much work the NameMaster has to do. But that`s not bad, he said, considering only 10 companies in the world specialize in names and considering his biggest competitor charges $35,000 a name. Plus expenses.
The NameMaster would like to charge $35,000, but he just turned professional six months ago. At the moment he is working on titles for a self- improvement book and a literary magazine in Pittsburgh.
One of his largest clients to date has been a dandruff shampoo.
”The phrase, `Take active control of your dandruff,` kept popping into my head,” the NameMaster said. ”So I came up with Actrol.”
That`s not to say that everything the NameMaster touches turns to gold. Take the time he tried to get Cleveland to change its name.
”Cleveland” has what he calls ”negative name equity,” which is the NameMaster`s way of saying ”bad connotations.”
”Mention Cleveland, and people think of a river burning,” he said.
”I thought that if we changed the name, maybe Cleveland wouldn`t be such a laughingstock. We need a more positive, assertive-sounding name. I came up with a bunch:
”Erieview. Lakeland. Woodlin. Americus. Agora. Romstar, just because of the sound. Amcot, short for `A Midwest City on the North Coast.` To name but a few.”
Yet to this day it`s still Cleveland.
”I couldn`t get any support,” the NameMaster said. ”It was very disappointing.”
Still, the NameMaster has persevered. He believes in himself, believes he knows what a name needs:
”A good name has to be short and punchy. It has to sound right-have the right phonetics, phonology, morphology, semantics and syntax.
”For example, the two leading painkillers are Anacin and Excedrin. The ingredients are identical, but Excedrin outsells Anacin something like 4 to 1. ”Why? Because of the name. Anacin has a negative sound-ana, anti, against. Excedrin sounds strong. A name you can trust. You feel like you`re getting something ex-tra.”
How about this? How about a name for a four-legged animal that chases cats?
”You mean like a dog?”
Right.
”It`s not that easy.I`d have to interview the client, do a lot of legwork and research, see what the competitors are doing.
”Oh, I could manufacture a name like `squibzot.` But it wouldn`t be right. A good name requires thought.”
