When Victoria’s Secret started hawking the Sexy Jean With VS Uplift, denim that promised to “lift” your derriere, it was easy to believe. After all, these are the people who brought us the Miracle Bra. Turns out the jeans’ secret is their trademarked VS Uplift technology (a black, nylon-spandex panel sewn inside, spanning from crotch to rear waistband). With hopes high, I emerged from the bedroom to my husband’s, alas, thumbs-down verdict: “Your rear looks … flatter.” Later, my friend wriggled into them and said they reminded her “of how Calvin Kleins used to smoosh your bottom down.” While the jeans generally were cute–rinse colors that feel very now, a double button closure in front–they didn’t boost my caboose, leaving me 90 bucks lighter and feeling like the butt of the joke. Stretch style shown, $68 at victoriassecret.com.
